Tea
This tea tastes like leaves. Well, granted that tea is made from leaves, there’s a proper extent to which it would – and should – taste like leaves. But then, apart from the question of the source of the thing, it should, also, taste like tea. After all, you wouldn’t expect cake to taste like flour, nor salt like rocks, nor wine like oak barrels and feet, nor shoes like cows. This tea tastes like leaves, and not like tea. Assuming that you would let pass the fact that I’m not British and therefore by default do not know what I’m talking about when it comes to tea, this tea really isn’t like proper tea at all. Take Marlboro Blue, for example. It tastes like paper. Not like a proper cigarette, which tastes like, well, a cigarette, with the requisite nicotine and tar and added in for the health benefits. Blue, on the other hand, tastes like someone took a roll of paper, burned it, and rolled it back into a cigarette. This is, incidentally, a nice complement to the kind o