Pace

Any relationship involving the desire to change the other is a desire to change the pace of his life. It is the ultimate disrespect: it is the disrespect of time. 

For when you want the other to change, for instance, a childish habit, what you are saying is: I love you now, yes, but can you hurry and grow up now? 

That "I love you now" is the problem, and not the latter part. For in being with the person now, you have shackled yourself to a commitment that is of now, but in your desire to change the other you bastardize that commitment to a future of your own ideal making, doubly a bastardization because it is of your hope. Triply so if you manage to convince yourself that that change is for the other's good.

That is why love borne of this desire is a serpent: its coils can snare you into narratives of grand intentions, when all you are is disrespectful of time.

For what does "I love you" mean if not: I love you now. And what you are now is the ground for your pace of your tomorrows. I love you means you shall not die. 

If you want to pay the highest tribute to time, then, you love. 

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