Playing Gaiman's Endless
While browsing through previous issues of FHM, we came across a Neil Gaiman interview - in which one of the questions was who would play the Endless if "The Sandman" was translated into a movie. Granted that it won't be (the whole thing's 70-odd issues, the eight story arcs of which would not be done justice to by any trilogy, quadrology, quintology or whatever cinematic serial acrobatics anyone can come up with), I found myself starting to think about who could indeed play each of the Endless. Gaiman only answered for Death and Dream - but I'm going for all seven.
For Destiny, the first actor to jump up and down in my head was Liam Neeson, if only for the automatic tags he has as a god, a retired dude with specific skill sets apart from parenting, and an absurdly large and golden lion. But then, if the voice is anything to go by, I would choose Morgan Freeman (since, as in the internets, he can be saying "titty sprinkles" and still sound like a goddamned god). I know he's black. So my brain, being what it is, jumped to Djimon Hounsou. Think about it. You will see what I mean after a couple of minutes. (It would help if you've just watched his unaffected characters in Amistad and Gladiator). And if you don't, well, hey. Tell me about your list. We were thinking about inserting Steve Buscemi somewhere in the list, but he's just too awesome. Maybe he can play Neil Gaiman.
I have to agree with Gaiman in this one. He chose Ellen Page for Death, since she "has charm." (Very informative blurb, article writer.) Remembering her in Juno sealed it, I think. Though I'm not sure if she can pull off a heavy and smoky makeup without making her face look like an adorable panda. Well, Holywood or the alienated laborers in British cinema can always go for a look that's black and simultaneously not gothic or emo. Although I can't imagine how that could turn out. Get out of my head, Avril Lavigne. You're blonde.
Ah, the hard part. Gaiman said "a younger Adrian Brody" would do it, but we were thinking it might be just because Gaiman looks like an older Adrian Brody - or perhaps it might be the rootless ache in his face in The Pianist, and in anywhere else, come to think of it. I was thinking of Johnny Depp - who wouldn't - but then Tom Hiddleston popped up and did a quick salute. It's not about his face. It's the hidden sadness in Loki, I think. He played that tug of war with getting-what-I-think-I-want, somebody-wrench-me-out-of-myself and the gloriously resigned it's-too-late, this-is-all-I-know. Johnny Depp is his own reason for playing Dream, no questions. He can play Morgan Freeman playing god, for god's sake.
Vinnie Jones's character in Gone in 60 Seconds, Sphinx, justifies this choice - especially in the later part of the movie where he speaks. And when he was eating the sandwich over the phone, punching numbers for "yes." On second thought, he might be too morose for this character. Laurence Fishburne might be good - I imagine the part of Destruction going onward and upward into the stars, which only Morpheus can pull off. In a samurai yoroi armor and kabuto helmet. Carrying a stick with a check hankie on the end of a katana. I'm mixing up my anime with my British fantasy now. Best kind of bastardizing, at least in my head.
Since Johnny Depp's already in this, Helena Bonham-Carter would be a few seconds behind. Those two have contracts drafted by the lord of siamese twins. I fear she would Bonham-Carter the character, though, as she does everything else. She's the only one who can pull off a black-palleted everything and still look like, well, someone doing a good job. Bit of overkill, though. Maybe for the sake of beautiful contradiction Julianne Moore can be Despair. And she'd still be a carrot for this one. Sounds interesting to me - or a fiasco you would forgive, if only because she's in it. Yes, I know, I will never have a career in this.
The glorious, androgynous Tilda Swinton. Think about it. The cruelty of Jadis and Swinton's Oscar Awards hair. No one else comes close. Angelina Jolie in Salt just looked like a forgivable cross-dresser who's only beautiful as a woman. I first thought of Cate Blanchett, but Queen Elizabeth and Galadriel are just too strong a tag in my head. Jolie would make Desire lean too much into a feminine bend, and Blanchett would just make it too solidly whimsical, like a straight rainbow. In one color - white.
Gaiman once said Tori Amos was the basis for some of Delirium's characteristics, though I don't know anything about Amos's character to be sure. The hair patches up for most of my ignorance, though. She'd be perfect for all of Delirium's song and dance montages in the series - and with all the actors in this list, the talent fee alone can buy an African country, so a musician might cut the cost by a hundred quid, I think. We might have a problem with the age, though - but Dakota Fanning already grew up, Kristen Stewart is too Kristen Stewart, and no, Avril, you're still blonde.
Photo credits go to http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lfe064HOU21qav9ywo1_500.jpg. Good job, dude. :)
For Destiny, the first actor to jump up and down in my head was Liam Neeson, if only for the automatic tags he has as a god, a retired dude with specific skill sets apart from parenting, and an absurdly large and golden lion. But then, if the voice is anything to go by, I would choose Morgan Freeman (since, as in the internets, he can be saying "titty sprinkles" and still sound like a goddamned god). I know he's black. So my brain, being what it is, jumped to Djimon Hounsou. Think about it. You will see what I mean after a couple of minutes. (It would help if you've just watched his unaffected characters in Amistad and Gladiator). And if you don't, well, hey. Tell me about your list. We were thinking about inserting Steve Buscemi somewhere in the list, but he's just too awesome. Maybe he can play Neil Gaiman.
I have to agree with Gaiman in this one. He chose Ellen Page for Death, since she "has charm." (Very informative blurb, article writer.) Remembering her in Juno sealed it, I think. Though I'm not sure if she can pull off a heavy and smoky makeup without making her face look like an adorable panda. Well, Holywood or the alienated laborers in British cinema can always go for a look that's black and simultaneously not gothic or emo. Although I can't imagine how that could turn out. Get out of my head, Avril Lavigne. You're blonde.
Ah, the hard part. Gaiman said "a younger Adrian Brody" would do it, but we were thinking it might be just because Gaiman looks like an older Adrian Brody - or perhaps it might be the rootless ache in his face in The Pianist, and in anywhere else, come to think of it. I was thinking of Johnny Depp - who wouldn't - but then Tom Hiddleston popped up and did a quick salute. It's not about his face. It's the hidden sadness in Loki, I think. He played that tug of war with getting-what-I-think-I-want, somebody-wrench-me-out-of-myself and the gloriously resigned it's-too-late, this-is-all-I-know. Johnny Depp is his own reason for playing Dream, no questions. He can play Morgan Freeman playing god, for god's sake.
Vinnie Jones's character in Gone in 60 Seconds, Sphinx, justifies this choice - especially in the later part of the movie where he speaks. And when he was eating the sandwich over the phone, punching numbers for "yes." On second thought, he might be too morose for this character. Laurence Fishburne might be good - I imagine the part of Destruction going onward and upward into the stars, which only Morpheus can pull off. In a samurai yoroi armor and kabuto helmet. Carrying a stick with a check hankie on the end of a katana. I'm mixing up my anime with my British fantasy now. Best kind of bastardizing, at least in my head.
Since Johnny Depp's already in this, Helena Bonham-Carter would be a few seconds behind. Those two have contracts drafted by the lord of siamese twins. I fear she would Bonham-Carter the character, though, as she does everything else. She's the only one who can pull off a black-palleted everything and still look like, well, someone doing a good job. Bit of overkill, though. Maybe for the sake of beautiful contradiction Julianne Moore can be Despair. And she'd still be a carrot for this one. Sounds interesting to me - or a fiasco you would forgive, if only because she's in it. Yes, I know, I will never have a career in this.
The glorious, androgynous Tilda Swinton. Think about it. The cruelty of Jadis and Swinton's Oscar Awards hair. No one else comes close. Angelina Jolie in Salt just looked like a forgivable cross-dresser who's only beautiful as a woman. I first thought of Cate Blanchett, but Queen Elizabeth and Galadriel are just too strong a tag in my head. Jolie would make Desire lean too much into a feminine bend, and Blanchett would just make it too solidly whimsical, like a straight rainbow. In one color - white.
Gaiman once said Tori Amos was the basis for some of Delirium's characteristics, though I don't know anything about Amos's character to be sure. The hair patches up for most of my ignorance, though. She'd be perfect for all of Delirium's song and dance montages in the series - and with all the actors in this list, the talent fee alone can buy an African country, so a musician might cut the cost by a hundred quid, I think. We might have a problem with the age, though - but Dakota Fanning already grew up, Kristen Stewart is too Kristen Stewart, and no, Avril, you're still blonde.
Photo credits go to http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lfe064HOU21qav9ywo1_500.jpg. Good job, dude. :)
I enjoyed reading this. I'm mostly glad Robert Downey Jr is nowhere in the list. How about Bjork for Death? Tori Amos made me think of her LOL.
ReplyDeleteHaha. Bjork is too.. Bjork. :) And she might not make it to shoots - with her being.. Bjork, and all. :)
ReplyDelete